Stress on top of stress on top of stress!

Wow, today has been very stressful. My ex-husband didn't come to pick up his daughter for the weekend. He actually said that work was more important to him. How can anything be more important to someone then their children? I don't understand how he can go so long without seeing Emma. It kills me when she leaves me for the weekend. I am ready for her to go with her dad when its time, but then I can't wait for her to come home. This was supposed to be my weekend to finally relax a little. I have plane tickets to Vegas for the weekend, and now I can't go. My dad and me were going for my birthday, and it would have been the first time going to Vegas for me. Now I am stuck at home, with my beautiful little girl. She is too young to know her dad was coming to get her. I just hope he doesn't do this when she gets older, like my dad did to me and my sister. I remember how hurt I was when my dad didn't show up and didn't call to tell us he wasn't coming. I won't let her feel that hurt, I will do anything to protect her from that pain. Sometimes I just feel like screaming, even though I know it won't help.

College and Single Mom

This week I feel like I may have taken on too much. I know I'm just second guessing myself, but Emma is cutting some molars, and only wants to sit on my lap. It makes it difficult to get homework done. I am made it through as much homework today as I could, because she took a long nap. I am glad she is asleep for the night, so that, I can have some mommy time. We all need our mommy time to keep our sanity, even if it is just a little bit of time. I hope tomorrow Emma will feel better and want to play some.

Week Four of the Semester

I have decided this week that I love to blog. I really do it everyday on my facebook page. I am going to try to blog on here more than once a week for English Composition, because it allows be to vent my feelings when I need to. We learned about plagiarism in English this week. I have had some experience with this in the past. When I was in high school another student printed one of my papers of my computer, when they stayed the night at my house. She then turned my paper in as her own. Not knowing about this I turned in the same paper. I had to go through so much to prove that it was my work and not hers. I was even suspended for it pending the investigation. At the end it was proven the paper was mine, and all I got was an apology and my suspension taken off the record. The other student had to repeat the semester over again, but she never came back to school. I don't believe it is fair for someone to cheat, or steal something that is yours. This is my opinion, and I know opinions can differ somewhat. It is agaist my code of ethics personally and professionally.

Third Week of The Semester

Well this has been a tough week for me. I haven't used my time wisely, and feel like I am drowning in homework. I guess thats the life of a college student and a full time single mother. Going to school online does make it easier to get everything done, that I need to get done in a day. This week I started writing a research paper in English Class and in Anatomy. I have chosen to write about Fetal Alcohol Syndrome for English. It is a topic I am very passionate about. I have found a lot of interesting information about this disease, and I don't understand how someone can do this to a child. It is a completely preventable disease, but there are thousands of children born with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome every year. I chose to write about the Endocrine System in Anatomy Class. I am not sure what direction I am going to go with that paper yet, but I will figure it out. Starting tomorrow I will get my time management back on schedule, so I don't feel like I am behind in my school work and my house work. Emma was sick this week so it has been more difficult. I hope she gets better soon, because I hate to see her feel so bad.

Introduction to My Life

My name is Trista Coolbaugh. I am twenty-five years old and a single mom to my beautiful daugter Emma. In 2002 I joined the army right after high school, and loved every minute of it. I was injured in a training exercise in 2004, and was discharged from the army. I got married to Kyle Coolbaugh on September 1, 2006, and started a new life with him. Soon after we got married I realized there was alot more to him, that I had never seen before. It was like on our wedding day I became his property, and I was no longer my own person. I went along with it for awhile, and I began to lose sight of who I was. I was no longer the fun, loving, energectic person that I once was. I became pregnant, and things got worse for my marriage. I expected my husband to grow up, and become a father. I was also determined to be the strong minded person that I knew I was deep down inside. I didn't see much of my husband during my pregnancy. We had different work schedules, and when I got home from work he would go out to the bar with his friends. This was an every night occurance, and he would never come home. His friends became more important to him then me and the small innocent child I was carrying. On April 14, 2008 I had my beautiful princess Emma Nicole Coolbaugh. Him and his mother came in the hospital and tried to control everything. I had spoken to my doctor and told her that they would try to run everything in the hospital, and I told her not to listen to them. I had a planned C-section, and I only wanted my mother to be with me. She said she was fine with that, and she knew he hadn't been involved in my pregnancy. She was not the doctor that delivered Emma, and some how my mother-in-law got to come in the room with me. After I had Emma I kicked everyone out of my room, because I couldn't see why they would care if they hadn't cared all along. I gave my husband the chance to grow and be a father, but his friends and partying still came first. I left my husband within a few months of Emma being born. I decided to go back to school so I can make a wonderful life for her. I now getting a divorce, and I know that she will never have to grow up with miserable parents. I have found the person I used to be, and I will never let anyone take that away from me. Kyle never did grow up, and doesn't do anything for his daughter. He will come and get her for a night once in awhile, but even then she usually stays with her grandpa or grandma. I know I made the right decision, and I will do everything I can to make sure she is never unhappy with her life. Its time to start a new chapter in our lives by starting over from scratch. I know that I can do it, and everyday will be a new challenge.